What Am I Going To Find?
The next morning as I was getting ready to go see mom, I was wondering what I was going to find. Was mom going to be back to the way she was before the surgery? Was she still going to be totally confused as to what all was going on? As soon as I get there, I guess I will be able to tell.
At least she had made it through the surgery okay. That’s what I kept telling myself. I didn’t want to think about her Alzheimer’s getting worse because of this surgery. Then I would be blaming myself for putting her through this and causing the disease to worsen.
Now Trouble At Work!
Before heading out of town to the hospital, I stopped by my office to update my boss as to what was going on. I did what I needed to do and informed my boss what was going on. I did not have an understanding boss. I’m just going to leave it at that. All I’m going to say on that subject is that changes may be in the wind at work too.
With the possibility of mom’s condition getting worse, it’s getting more and more dangerous leaving her at home alone. When I checked on a few of the options for home care during the day while I’m at work, that was pretty much ruled out. The cost of that was a little beyond our means.
Mom, Do You Know Who I Am?
When I arrived in the ICU to see mom and they were getting ready to move her to a regular room. That was good news! As I walked up to mom’s bedside, she appeared to be giving me a look of confusion. I asked her what was wrong? She didn’t answer me. Mom, do you know who I am? All of a sudden she smiled and said, of course, I know you! You’re my daughter!
Wow! You scared me, mom! You were looking at me like you didn’t know me! She just said that was silly. She went on to tell that they were fixing to let her go home. Whoops! All of a sudden the good feeling that everything was okay was coming to a stop! So now I had to break it to her that she wasn’t going home.
Moving Out of ICU
Okay, mom, they are just moving you to a regular room. You still have to be here in the hospital for several more days. Your leg has to heal up a little bit longer before you can go home. I waited for the argument. All she said was that her leg does still hurt some, so she guess that would be best. Okay, we are good then!
The nurse comes and gets her up to walk now to keep circulation moving through that new vein so that is doesn’t collapse. As she’s sitting up in a chair now, she starts again about going home. Again, I explain to her that she needs to be there a little while longer to make sure that the vein holds up okay.
She’s Not Remembering
By the end of the week, mom has driven everyone crazy wanting to go home. She did not know why she had to be there and she was getting upset. At this point, I noticed that the sore on her heel had almost healed! With all of the excitement, I had forgotten all about the sore. But now that I noticed it, it was almost gone! Amazing what a little circulation will do. When I tried pointing this out to mom, she wasn’t listening.
Mom’s finally back home after a week in the hospital. Hopefully, we can start getting back to a normal schedule again. I needed to get back to a regular schedule at work. Things weren’t going very smoothly there anyway.
Trying to get back to my work schedule was not going over well with mom. She wasn’t wanting me to leave to go to work. She seemed very uneasy about me leaving. She wanted to know how long I was going to be gone. She asked me repeatedly what time I’d be home. I felt really bad for her as she seemed childlike, almost afraid for me to leave. Thinking back, she probably was.
My Job Title May Be Fixing to Change
With each passing week since mom had her surgery, it’s getting more and more difficult and dangerous to leave mom home alone. I tried again checking into a few of the home health assistance programs. That seemed like a lost cause as it would take my paycheck to pay for them to come in to care for mom. Sound familiar? Child Daycare? Same thing, just as expensive, probably more. I haven’t paid for daycare for a long time.
I’m afraid mom is going to try one day to take off out of the house and get lost. Then, I would feel really bad if something happened to her. There was only one choice for me. Considering the circumstances at work anyway, and my mom needs me a lot more, I left my full-time job. I became a full-time Caregiver for my mom.
Take Care & Be Well